we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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