don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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