i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
