I just pynch a tree in the face
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
