i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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