Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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