just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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