): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize