margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i dont even know how to be here
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
