Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
