And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
