# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
i think we sleep fucked last night...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
