i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
