Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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