I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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