At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Found your dick twin last night
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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