The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize