i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
