You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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