is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Two words: nipple clamps
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