Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
