I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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