i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
May the power of my ass compel you!!
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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