You work out of a Hotel?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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