I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
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The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
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the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?