Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
