Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
We had sex on a dog bed..
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
