it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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