Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
