If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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