I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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