I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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