I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
You may now shotgun with the bride
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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