we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
