3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
And then he peed in my hair
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