I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize