who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
