I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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