i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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