so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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