I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
He better not be in your backpack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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