Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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