I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
