sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
