just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
