So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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