new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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