Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
they're like a gay fantastic four
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
