do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
