bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Barsexuality is the new black.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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