what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
