Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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