Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
